I Have Allergies!
(A one-act play for children)
by Christiane Laperle
based on an idea by Maxime “Epi-Man” Beaucaire translated from the original French by Karen Eck
Characters:
Kid 1: “Allergic Kid”—use the actor’s real name (in this case, Max)
Kid 2: “Worry Wart”
Kid 3: “Cool Kid”
Kid 4: “Observer”
Kid 5: “Super-Reader”
Ice cream man
Receptionist
2 Superheroes—in this text they are Superman and Spider-Man, but they can be replaced with any well-known Superheroes
Epi-Man (new hero)
Scenery:
At one end of the stage, a park bench with a phone booth to one side. At the other end of the stage, a receptionist’s desk with two telephones.
Narrator: It is summer – a very hot day in the beautiful month of June. Some children are playing in the local city park on the planet Trisun, a planet with three suns.
(Kid 1 stops playing and sits on the park bench, sweating. The other children follow him one by one.)
Kid 1: (once the others have joined him) Whew! It sure is hot! I’m all sweaty!
Kid 2: (who is using an umbrella as a parasol) You should protect yourself from the sun more! You might get sun-stroke! It’s very dangerous, you know!
Kid 3: Relax, Mr. Worry-Wart. We just got here.
Kid 4: (smiling) Hey! I hear music! Listen!
An ice cream man comes onstage with a cooler in a wheelbarrow.
I Have Allergies! (A one-act play for children) 1 of 7
Kid 5: It’s the ice cream man! Let’s go! Cool refreshing ice cream straight ahead!
Kids 2, 3, 4, and 5 run towards the ice cream man. Kid 1 stays behind, crouches down on the ground, and starts crying.
Ice cream man: Ah-ha! I knew my ice cream would make people happy in this heat! Step right up! One at a time! There’s something for everyone!
Everyone buys an ice cream cone; then they realize that Kid 1 isn’t there. Worried, the other children return to him with their ice cream cones in their hands. They gather around him.
Kid 2: You see? I told you he’d get sick! Sun-stroke, just like I told you! He’s got sun-stroke!!
Kid 3: (very calmly) Why are you crying, Max? Are you hurt?
Kid 1: (sadly) No! (Boo-hoo-hoo! Sniff sniff!)
Kid 4: So what’s wrong, then? Is it ‘cause you don’t have any money to buy an ice cream cone? I can lend you some.
Kid 1: (crying even harder) NO!
Kid 5: I know! You’re sad because you can’t read all the flavors of ice cream. Come with me, Max! I can read all of them for you. I’m almost finished grade 1 and (very proudly), I must admit I’m rather good.
Kid 1: (very sad and discouraged) No! You don’t understand!
Kid 2, 3, 4, 5 (all together): Then what’s wrong??
Kid 1: I have food allergies!! (sniffles, rubs his eyes, cries a bit more, breathes heavily)
Kid 2, 3, 4, 5 (all together): Food allergies?! (Kids 3, 4, and 5 crouch down to console Kid 1)
Kid 2: (in a state of panic) Allergies! Oh my goodness! (runs from one side of the stage to another, panicking) Hurry! We have to do something! Hurry! I don’t know what—but—hurry! Hurry!!
Kid 3: (stands up, exasperated) Calm down! I don’t know what to do either, but I know we have to stay calm!
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Kid 2: (grabs Kid 3 by the shoulders and shakes him/her a bit) We have to hurry! H-U-R-R-Y! He could swell up! He could blow up! He could… (Kid 2 stops and looks at the audience) DIE. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! (Kid 2 falls unconscious, with his umbrella landing farther away)
Kid 3: Great. That’s just great. Now we’ve got two sick kids on our hands.
Kid 1: I’m not sick! I have allergies! (He continues crying and looking sad.)
Kid 4: (standing up) Hey! I remember now! I think I saw a sign the other day – yes, I’m sure I saw it – at the park entrance. A big sign that said: “Allergy Assistance.” Maybe we could read it and get some advice on what to do!
Kid 5: I see it over there. Quick—let’s go look!
They all run towards the sign, pulling along Kid 1 who is still very sad. They leave Kid 2 lying unconscious on the ground.
Kid 5: (arriving in front of the sign) A lovely big sign with lots of words to read. Mmmmm. I love it.
Kid 5 places his/her audience—the other kids—in a semicircle in front of the sign and gets prepared as if giving a speech.
Kid 5: (clearing throat) A-hem! Allergy Assistance. If the person has red eyes . . .
All the kids look at Kid 1, who does indeed have red eyes from crying. They all very obviously nod their heads “Yes.”
Kid 5: If his eyes are watering . . . (They look at Kid 1 and nod their heads “Yes”)
If he has problems breathing . . . (They look at Kid 1 who is crying, hiccupping and breathing heavily between sobs)
Kid 1: I . . . have . . . allergies! (The other kids nod their heads “Yes”)
Kid 5: If he is swelling up . . . (They all look at Kid 1)
All together: His eyes are swollen! Yes!
Kid 5: (continuing to read) If you know someone with all these symptoms, call “SUPERHERO HOTLINE” toll-free at [make up a number or use a real emergency number children can call in case of an allergic reaction].
Kid 2: (who wakes up briefly) Hurry! We have to call! Hurry! (Kid 2 passes out again)
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Kid 4: Look—over there! A phone booth! (Kid 4 goes over to the phone booth and dials while saying the numbers out loud)
At the other side of the stage there is a receptionist sitting at the desk. One of the phones rings.
Receptionist: Superhero Hotline! May I help you?
Kid 4: We have a kid with food allergies – hurry! He’s crying, he’s . . . dripping . . . he’s . . . red . . . he’s . . . Hurry!
Receptionist: (stands up, panicking a bit) Oh! Yes! Of course! I’ll send you Superman right away!
(THEME MUSIC PLAYS)
Receptionist: (speaking into the second telephone) Hurry Superman! An allergic kid needs help at the local park!
Superman: (grumbling a bit) But I don’t know anything about food allergies!
Receptionist: Here! Take the Superhero Handbook. You should find something helpful in it. (She pushes him a bit.) Go on! You are very SUPER after all!
(Superman very proudly struts about the stage.)
Superman: You’re right! I am very super. Okay! Allergies! Superman to the rescue!!
(Superman runs behind the screen, his two hands in front as if he’s flying. He arrives at the local park. Play theme music if possible.)
Kids 3, 4, 5: Wow—Superman! That was fast!
Kid 2: (wakes up again) Superman? Did you say Superman? (He sees Superman and puts his hand over his heart as if he’s had a shock.) Oh my goodness! It’s really him! Superman!
Kid 3: This way, Superman. The allergic kid needs you.
Superman: (approaches Kid 1 in a reassuring manner) Hello son. Here—wear this ring. It doesn’t have the power to take away allergies, but it will give you more energy.
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Kid 1: (Puts on the ring and feels better) Thanks, Superman! That makes me feel better. But you know, I’m not having an allergic reaction. If my eyes are red and watery, it’s because . . . well . . . I’m sad. I’m really, really sad.
Kid 4: What’s making you feel so sad?
Kid 1: It’s just that, even though my parents take really good care of me, and even though I always wear my epinephrine injector in case of an emergency (Kid 1 sighs), I still feel all alone. I’m still afraid and I still don’t feel like people understand what it’s like to have food allergies.
Kid 2: What would help you feel less alone and less afraid?
Kid 1: (very excited and turning towards Superman) I want there to be a superhero who takes care of allergies!
Superman: What an excellent idea! Have you thought about what kind of powers this superhero would have, and what he would look like?
Kid 1: Of course! I’ve been dreaming about him for a long time, and I’ve even drawn a picture of him. Here—this is what he looks like. I always carry it close to my heart. (Kid 1 takes a piece of paper out of his shirt and shows it to Superman) My hero has a big heart—and super powerful ears that hear the calls for help from all the allergic kids who need him. And he is really strong.
Superman: Wonderful! With you and this drawing, we can create a new superhero! I’m going to call my good friend Spider-Man at the Ministry of Superheroes and ask him to bring us the Superhero-Making Machine. (With a cell phone, he tries several numbers with no luck and grows impatient) What is the number of that Ministry?!
Kid 4: Wait! I remember seeing it somewhere… Oh yeah—[number for Superhero Hotline office]!
Superman: (dials)
Receptionist: (the telephone rings at the Superhero Hotline office) Superhero Hotline! May I help you?
Superman: Yes! It’s me, Superman. Could you please ask Spider-Man to join me at the local park with the Superhero-Making Machine?
Receptionist: Right away sir! (she changes phones) Attention, Spider-Man! You’re wanted at the local park with the Superhero-Making Machine!
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(Spider-Man enters and sits all crouched up on the receptionist’s desk. She jumps when she finally notices him.)
Spider-Man: Yes ma’am! I’ll swing on over there right away!
(Superman passes behind the scenery and comes out with a large tube or box—the Superhero-Making Machine—near the kids. The children welcome him.)
Kids 3, 4, 5: Spider-Man! That was fast!
Spider-Man: We superheroes are fast!
Superman: (shaking Spider-Man’s hand) Thanks for helping out, my friend. Now, let’s get to work! We have a new superhero to create. Max, come over here. You have to get into this machine for it to give you your new powers.
Kid 1: What?! Me? I’m going to be a superhero?
Superman: Yes . . . you, because the first ingredient you need to make a superhero is the desire to help people.
Spider-Man: Don’t worry. You’ll still be a little boy. But whenever you get a call from an allergic child, you’ll transform into a superhero.
Kid 2: (While Kid 1 is getting ready to get into the machine) Wait!! Are you sure there isn’t any danger, Superman? Is your machine really safe?
Superman: Completely safe, Mr. Worry Wart! This machine is Super… Hyper… ULTRA SAFE!
(Kid 2 moves away, satisfied.)
Superman: (talking to Kid 1) Well, go ahead, son. Take your drawing too. It has all the necessary powers, and they’ll be transferred to you once you’re in the machine. May the force be with you!
(Kid 1 gets in. They turn several buttons and pull on several levers and we hear electronic music. Everyone dances around the tube/box until the music stops. When the music stops, everyone gathers around the machine. Kid 1 appears in his new costume: white t-shirt, white tights, black undies over tights, yellow boots, white cape with yellow trim, black mask, and black belt or E-BELT®.)
Kid 4: Wow!
Kid 5: You are really SUPER!
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Kid 3: Cool!
Kid 2: Are you okay? You’re not sick?
Kid 1: I feel really, really good—and ready to help all the kids with food allergies. With my powers I’ll be able to hear them and go to help them, no matter where they are in the world.
Spider-Man: Hey, Max! Have you thought of a name for your superhero? Max is a nice name, but it’s not very original.
Kid 1: Of course I have! I’ve been thinking about it for a long, long time. I’m going to be called… EPI-MAN!
Everyone: (one knee on the ground and one hand lifted up towards Epi-Man) Three cheers for Epi-Man! Hurray! Long live Epi-Man!
The End
Epi-Man is the creation of Maxime Beaucaire, who drew his first Epi-Man in 2004 when he was just 6 years old. Max has severe multiple food allergies, as does his younger brother Xavier (aka Epi-Man Jr.)
In spring 2005, Max’s grade one teacher, Mme Christiane, wrote a play about Epi-Man called “J’ai des allergies!” Max and his classmates performed the play in June 2005 to a sold-out crowd.
Max, Xavier, and their mom Karen (leader of the Ottawa Anaphylaxis Support Group) are very involved in allergy education and advocacy.
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